Back to the beginning

Okay, so I’ve slacked on just about everything lately!!  It’s now time to get back on track, yet again.  I can’t believe we are already into July!?  This year is just flying by isn’t it?  And, I’m back where I started from…….

I have slacked on my exercise and gorged over this holiday weekend.  I am tired of going down this road and need to get it right once and for all.  Besides overeating over this weekend and not really exercising much lately, I still am not drinking enough water and definitely not sleeping more than 4-5 hrs at a time.  I do believe that if I can conquer those 4 things: eating, drinking enough water, exercising, and sleeping enough–I will be successful.

My mistake has been trying to focus on, and fix, everything at once. Now I will try something different.  I am going to set my menu’s and exercise schedules and follow them.  I don’t feel these are my biggest problems. My biggest problems are lack of sleep and not drinking enough water.

I think I’ve said in previous posts that I get insomnia every couple of years and it wreaks havoc for a few months before finally disappearing.  I’m in the midst of it at this time and need to find steps (non-medicine) to get myself to sleep at least 7 hours each night.  I wake up every day still exhausted and it takes me forever to get up the energy to get myself ready.

Each morning I get up I tell myself that this is the day I will finally get to 8 glasses of water.  The closest I got was on this past Monday when I actually drank 7 cups of water!  So, let’s see if I can surpass that today?!?! 

Oh, and I didn’t yet mention that over the holiday weekend, I managed to gain 5 lbs.  How does one do that?  Honestly, I ate a lot of crap……..and I mean A LOT of CRAP!!

I hate doing this alone, but I am realistic in my knowledge that I won’t get help from family and friends.  This is a sad truth I keep hoping will change, but I know won’t.  So, I will be my own motivator.  How I will do this, I’m not quite sure at this time.  I am going to take it one step (and day) at a time.  That’s the best I can do for now.

Tuesday Wrap-Up, RealityTV, & a Book Review

I haven’t been very good at logging my food & everything else this week so far.  Today I haven’t written anything down but it’s pretty easy so here goes:

Sleep:

Last night I slept a total of 7 1/2 hrs, which is a lot for me lately!!  Too bad it wasn’t all at once.  I slept for 6 hrs, was awake for about 45 min’s and then slept again for 1 1/2 hrs.  At least I got over 7 hrs of sleep!  If it’s going to take baby steps to get back on track, then I’ll take it!

Eating:

Breakfast:  1/2 cup Shredded Wheat, 1/2 cup 1% milk, 1/2 cup blueberries

Snack:  Venti sugar-free Cinnamon Dolce Latte

Lunch:  1 cup of watermelon, 1 Klondike bar (I know, not good–but I wasn’t really that hungry and ice cream sounded soooo good!)

Snack:  2 Wasa crackers, 1 wedge Laughing Cow cheese

Dinner:  Herb & Gorgonzola Frittata, 1 bottle of Snapple diet Trop-A-Rocka

Dessert:  It’s It (another ice cream sandwich…what can I say??)

Water:

So far I’ve had 4 cups of water and I’m still drinking…..I’m hoping to get to 7-8 cups by bedtime

Exercise:

**crickets**

I only ran once last week but it was a good workout.  The heat has been so bad the past couple of days (Sunday and Monday were both over 100*F.  Today was in the high 90′s.  I really need to start getting up early in the morning to workout otherwise I won’t do it since it’s so hot.  Let’s see what happens tomorrow morning….I really need some motivation!!

As for Tuesday night TV, I am watching the San Francisco Giants get beat by the LA Dodgers.  I’m so NOT happy right now…..I had to change the channel to Hell’s Kitchen.  I watched part of Losing It With Jillian.  Later on I’ll be watching The Hills, The City and Kathy Griffin: My Life On The D List.

Last night I watched Real Housewives of NJ.  What is up with Danielle?  She is the craziest person on TV (well, she’s tied with Kelly from Real Housewives of NY).  But the difference between Danielle and Kelly, I think, is that Kelly is crazy cuckoo and needs to go see a psychiatrist but I don’t think she’s dangerous; whereas Danielle is off-her-rocker, she’s-gonna-snap-at-any-moment, scary crazy.

Both Kelly and Danielle live in their own little worlds, which don’t even come close to reality…..but Danielle is the one I think I would be afraid to be anywhere near at any time!!  Neither one should be on a reality show or anywhere on TV or the public eye.  Hopefully Bravo does what’s best for those two and let’s them out of their contract so they can get the help they desperately need!!

I have been trying to watch The Bachelorette this season since Ali is from the Bay Area.  I’ve never seen this show before this season, but to be honest, I cannot believe people watch it.  Has anyone on the show that matched up ever actually marry each other?? And if so, how many?? It HAS to be a very low number.

This seasons bachelorette, Ali, is a little dim, I think.  She’s very cute and all, but not so bright.  And, as for the guys, I am so NOT impressed!!  I have honestly found this show to be one of the most boring reality shows that I’ve ever seen!!  I’ll see it through to the end, but this is one girl who will not waste another Monday night watching this sham of a show!!  And, I can’t imagine watching the Bachelor where it’s a house full of women.  That would have to be the biggest catfight every single week.  I don’t think I could take it!! haha

I finished reading Lipstick Jungle this weekend.  It started off really slow and took a while for me to warm up to it.  The warm up, however, was lukewarm at best!!  Ms Bushnell has managed to have her characters appear in 3 books:  Four Blondes, Trading Up (which I’m still trying to read) and Lipstick Jungle.  What’s the matter, couldn’t she come up with any original characters??

If the characters were really interesting, then it would be okay.  However, they were cliched Hollywood or wealthy types and I was very disappointed to see them rehashed!!

After reading 3 Candace Bushnell books (Sex & The City, Four Blondes, & Lipstick Jungle), I find her writing sub-par and amateurish at best.  I’m so disappointed considering all of the hype around her and the fact that I am a HUGE Sex & The City TV show and movie fan.  But then, she didn’t write any of those, now, did she??  Thank goodness for that!!

After I finish reading Trading Up (so far just as boring as the others with forgettable characters) I will read The Carrie Diaries.  Luckily I didn’t buy any of these books, but  checked them out of the library.  I’m on a long list for the Carrie Diaries at the local library and it should be my turn in about a month or so…..

I started reading The Undomestic Goddess by Sophie Kinsella last night.  It’s okay so far but at least it’s more entertaining than what I’ve been reading!!

Running, eating & Tuesday night TV

I didn’t want, but I needed, to run today.  It’s been 6 days since I’ve done any type of exercise and my body is not happy with me!  I tried to put it off as long as I could…

hoping the feeling would pass….

but it didn’t.  So, I put my running shoes on and went to the park.

It was 68*F and 47% humidity….but luckily there was a nice cool breeze that made it tolerable.

I don’t know why I fight exercising because once I get going I feel so much better, both physically and mentally.

I only ran 2 miles today….which is good because my goal was 1 mile

I almost stopped off at Baskin Robbins for their $1.50 a scoop family night after my run, but decided against it.  I think it was a good call.  I’m craving something sweet but I don’t have anything in the house.  Well, I do have sugar-free jello pudding in the cupboard.  I guess that will have to do…..

breakfast:

Shredded Wheat, blueberries and 1% milk

lunch:

tuna salad "sandwich"

dinner:

Turkey burger, shredded brussel sprouts and a salad

Since the San Francisco Giants game is over my night is free to watch my other shows.  So, right now I’m watching Kitchen Nightmares which I love!! Then I think I will check out NCIS: LA.  I am one of the few people I know who has never seen it.  Love LL Cool J but haven’t had the chance to check this show out.  Then the show I wait all week to watch:  The Hills, and then The City.  I have become completely addicted to these scripted reality shows. What is wrong with me?!

Well, enjoy your night………

So….dinner was wonderful.  I enjoyed Kitchen Nightmares and NCIS: Los Angeles.  I will admit that I never made dessert.  I had a Snapple Trop-A-Rocka instead.  It did the trick and my “sweet craving” was satisfied!  BTW, thank you Bret Michaels for this sugar-free treat….YOU ROCK!!! Now….on to The Hills and The City

The Year of Me

Yesterday I finished reading Eat, Pray, Love.  Can I just say I truly love this book!  It is everything I thought I was  searching for when I was going through my divorce 5 years ago.  But, I think I am able to get more out of it now.

Looking back, I realize that I would have never been able to appreciate this book while going through that time of my life.  I had allowed too much negativity, misery, and depression in and didn’t have the strength, or support system, to climb out of the hole I had dug myself into.

It’s funny, but that old saying is true:  “When good and bad things happen to you…you find out who your real friends are.”  Although my friends wanted me to be there for them through their triumphs and tragedies (& I was), they were nowhere to be found when I was in need.

So, I had to slowly, but surely, “pull myself up by my bootstraps” and move on with my life.  I won’t lie, it took a long long time since I had to figure it all out for myself.  Through many starts and stops I have been able to get my life back.

At the beginning of this year I made a list of goals I wanted to fulfill in 2010.  I’m really bad about starting something and then never following through.

But for whatever reason….this year seems to be the year I truly am ready to make some real changes in my life.  Do I know what changes I want to make?  In general, yes.  Now that’s where the book comes in.  No, I am not planning to follow Elizabeth Gilbert’s trip through Italy, India, and Indonesia (Bali), although it does sound good!!  But it has helped me get closer to making some decisions that I have needed, but been reluctant or afraid, to make for a long time!

I have made 2010 the Year of Me.  That’s right!  I have been devoting myself to self-improvement.  It’s been a long, sometimes painful, process so far but anything worth having is worth working for, right?!

As for my friends?  I have stepped away.  I need to decide what types of people I really want, and need, in my life.  True friendship is give-and-take (not just take) and a real gift!!  Are the people I’ve surrounded myself with over the years worthy of the title of friend?? We shall see.

Also, I feel that for this process to work I need to spend time alone.  And for those of you afraid of that fact, don’t be.  You have to like yourself before anyone else can like you!  So, if you don’t want to be alone with yourself, how do you expect anyone else to want to be with you??  Just a thought!!

National Running Day

Today, June 2nd is National Running day!! I did my part by running 3 miles late this afternoon.  I would be lying if I said it was an easy 3 miles.  I haven’t run in 9 days, which definitely wasn’t the problem.  The temperature & humidity made it a miserable run.

The temperature was 79*F and the humidity was 47%.  It doesn’t sound that bad…but it felt more humid than 47%.  I wore running shorts and a moisture wicking top and didn’t forget my water this time (thank goodness because I really needed it!!).

When I got to the place I normally run and got out of my car, I was already sweating…which didn’t bode too well for a great run.  I dragged for most of the way and didn’t run as well as I’d hoped.  During the last 1/4 mile I almost threw up.  Yes, I know…TMI!!  Sorry, but it had to be said….

But even though it wasn’t my best run I completed my task and feel good about that!!   I am proud of myself for not quitting.  Gotta take each success as it comes, no matter if it’s big or small…..

A time to reflect

Another month has passed.  It’s unbelievable to me that half of 2010 is almost over! With the start of a new month I was thinking about what I have (and have not) accomplished so far this year.

The highlight for me has been running in my first 5K last month.  This is something I’ve wanted to do for years but kept putting off until now!  It was an incredible experience and I cannot wait to run another race.  I was planning on running in another 5K this upcoming Saturday, but due to lack of funds I have had to forgo any extracurricular activities until things change.  So, I will continue to train and when the money situation changes I will be ready for  my next race!!

Another accomplishment is spring cleaning.  I have been able to go through each room, clean it thoroughly, and dump a lot of stuff!!  I have reorganized and cleaned all of the nooks & crannies that I normally don’t have time for.  It is a great feeling!

I have been able to read.  One of my favorite pastimes has always been reading and throughout my life I have always made time for this hobby.  However, in the past few years I haven’t had time to read much of anything due to work.   So, I am playing catch-up.  Besides the stack of books at home calling my name, the library has become my second home.

I have started to blog.  This is all still new to me…I’ve only been doing it for a month.  I’m not used to putting myself out there, so this is truly a learning experience that anyone reading my posts can see.  So far I am enjoying the whole process and will get the hang of it soon.

I have a re-found love of cooking.  I have always been fascinated with cooking and enjoyed it growing up.  When I was in college I met my now ex-husband, who is a chef, so as an adult I never had to cook.  No, he rarely cooked at home but either he would bring something home from the restaurant or we would just go out.  The few times I tried to cook during our many years of marriage would be ridiculed so I finally just gave up.

But, thanks to Suzanne Somers and her books, I am enjoying the whole cooking process as well as understanding food.

One of  my biggest failings this year is not losing weight.  I started exercising again this year and have tried changed my eating habits but so far I am only down to 168 lbs (as of this morning).  It’s difficult to do this alone without any support, and I have to be realistic…I am alone in this.  My friends and family have not been supportive.  They say they are…but in practice, uh, not so much.

They all say they need to exercise, but when I try to engage them…they are “too busy” & want me to blow off my workouts to hang with them.  And, when it comes to eating my family and friends eat the worst possible foods and in massive proportions.  Honestly, it makes my life easier to just be by myself for now.

There are many other things I haven’t yet accomplished this year but that is because of one thing I haven’t been able, and need, to accomplish….getting a job.  I know many many people/friends who are unemployed like myself.  A few of them have recently gotten jobs so I know things are starting to look up.  Hopefully it’s just a matter of time before, I too, am an employed member of society again!!

So…..here’s to the start of a new month.  I hope it’s successful for us all……..

Monday’s run, but no 30 Day Shred

Normally I try to run Tuesdays/Thursdays/Saturday or Sunday.  However, I haven’t been very consistent with my running lately….a little laziness maybe??  Anyway, I also looked up the weather forecast for this week and made the decision to do something different.  Instead of waiting until Tuesday, I decided to start my week of with a run.

So, this afternoon I checked the weather, changed my clothes and went running.  The weather was a cool 64*F, but the humidity was 50%, and the winds were 13 mph.  I wore shorts (because of the humidity) but wore a long sleeve cotton shirt (because of the winds).  It ended up being the perfect outfit!!

I ran my usual route but changed it around a little.  Running the neighborhood is 1 mile up and 1 mile back and running around the park trail 3 times equals 1 mile.  Normally I run the neighborhood first and finish up with the park.  However, too often I am finding myself finding excuses to stop before I run the full mile in the park.  So, I ran the 3 laps first and then ran up and back down the main street.  It worked out perfect!!

When I run the neighborhood, it is opposite from where my car is parked so I can’t quit….I have to either walk or run back.  See, sometimes I have to use psychology on myself!!  How sad is that?!  I started my run a little too fast because my legs were exhausted the last 1/4 mile and it took everything I had to run my intervals and finish somewhat strong!

I am continuing my interval schedule from last week: 2 minute run/2 minute walk X 9.  However, since I ran 3 full miles today what I actually ended up running was:  run 2 minutes X 11/walk 2 minutes x 10, + 1:13 min walk.  It was a great run and it put me in a great mood for the week.

Because I ran so late–6:15pm, I have decided not to do my 30 Day Shred workout tonight.  I debated this with myself but decided that whenever I do the workout after my run (usually a few hours) my knee’s are “not right” ( I don’t really know how to describe it, they don’t necessarily hurt, but I can “feel” them).  I would have been doing the workout within a half and hour from when I got home from running.  I don’t want to mess up my knee’s, so I am going to err on the side of caution. Don’t worry, I will be back tomorrow to do Day 10….the last day of level 1!!

Tonight I will do some ab work and a little yoga.  Dancing With The Stars is on tonight as well as the premiere of The Bachelorette.  I have never seen The Bachelor or Bachelorette before…but the girl is from the Bay Area, so I thought I’d check it out.   Besides, Real Housewives of New Jersey is on at 10pm so I probably won’t watch all of it anyway.

Today for breakfast I had a Sugar-free Cinnamon Dolce Latte from Starbucks –no whip.  I know, not the best choice, but it’s better than nothing!  For lunch I had a turkey burger and Summer Squash Medley (leftovers from the other day).  After my run I had a Fuji apple w/2 Tbsp of peanut butter.  For dinner tonight I am going to have whole grain pasta and broccoli. Also, for snack earlier today I had a few walnuts.

I’m still not drinking enough water.  I know I’m dehydrated, even though I don’t really feel like it.  So far today I’ve had 4 cups of water.  I am going to go guzzle some more and maybe I can get to 8 cups by bedtime?? Fingers crossed!!

30 Day Shred-Day 9

Well, this is day 9 of doing the Shred. I only have 1 more day for Level 1 and then I’m moving on to Level 2.  I’m excited to try a new workout!!

Well, after watching my SFGiants lose, yet again, to the Oakland A’s I was more than ready to do my workout and expend the frustration I was feeling as a SFGiants fan!  I did the routine following the advanced trainer, well except the push-ups–I still use my knees!!!  The only time I had problems today was towards the end doing the arm raises w/weights.  But, like I’ve said before I’ve always had weak arms and I’m doing my best to strengthen them up!

Well, I am off to watch Celebrity Apprentice and eat dinner.  I have wanted to see Bret Michael’s win this thing since the very first episode.  I was so happy to see him make it to the finals…..a few times I wasn’t sure he would make it!

Flip-flop shopping & the 30 Day Shred

Late last night I did Day 7 of the Shred.  It was a great workout, but even after taking a shower I couldn’t sleep.  That wasn’t good because I had to get up early–my mom and I were going to Old Navy for their $1.00 flip-flop sale that started at 7am!!

We got to Old Navy around 6:45 am and there was already a line.  At 7am they only let a certain number of people in at a time so it wasn’t crazy and we could shop without the frenzy of last year.  The limit was 5 pairs of flip-flops again.  We were in and out within 15 minutes.

Then we walked over to Panera to have breakfast.  I had already looked at their website the night before to see what I wanted.  Normally I would get a cinnamon roll and hot chocolate but I am trying to eat better!  I ended up with a blueberry bagel with 2 little packets of butter (I think they were only 1 tsp each) and hot tea.  I wanted green tea but the tea company no longer has green tea (what?? That is beyond belief!)

After a leisurely breakfast we drove across town to the local farmers market.  They just started it back up for the summer so not all of the vendors were there.  It was beautiful weather this morning–clear skies and a slight breeze.  Perfect for a walk through the farmers market.

Well, that weather didn’t last long.  By noon it was black clouds, sprinkling and very windy!!  I’m telling you, this Northern California weather this year so far has really been interesting, to say the very very least!

I watched the SFGiants game and had lunch–a turkey burger and summer squash medley–I made it all last night and portioned it out for meals this upcoming week.  After the game, with the winds howling, the rain coming down and me being exhausted, I took a nap. I never take naps…that means I was really tired!!

When I woke up I did a little housework and then did the 30 Day Shred–Day 8.  I can’t believe I only have 2 more days at Level 1.  I was really tired and didn’t want to work out today.  Like I keep saying, the old me would have just skipped it.  But I got myself up, put my workout outfit on, turned the dvd player on and just did it!!

Now, I feel great and am so glad I decided to stick with my schedule!  It was a butt-kicking sweat-fest as usual.   Can’t wait to do it again tomorrow!!

Ran a new route but boy did I miscalculate the mileage

Just got back from my run.  This morning I decided to map out several different routes because I am getting bored with the one I’ve been using.  Well when I mapped out the route I ended up using today, I calculated it at 3.6 miles.

I have run this route before, but it’s been about 4 yrs.  Today’s temperature was 64*F, humidity was 46% and we had 18 mph winds.  I wish Mother Nature would make up her mind as to what Northern California weather is going to be!! Every day this week has been different.  Please….enough already!  Anyway, it is cool outside and it sprinkled earlier.  Since I still saw some black-ish clouds I decided to dress accordingly.  I wore my long nylon pants with 100% cotton long sleeve shirt with my gray nylon hoodie.

My current schedule is: 2 minutes run/2 minutes walk X 9.  I knew I would probably end up running more than that since I thought I was going to run 3.6 miles.

Well, the run was great.  I felt fantastic throughout and at the end.  I almost ran a little extra but didn’t.  Kinda wish I did after I found out I had calculated it out wrong   When I was done I stopped the timer on my watch and saw that I had only run 8 reps plus 36 seconds extra.  So, when I got home I re-checked the route and I was way off!!  This route is only 2.46 miles.  Don’t ask how I mis-calculated it because I have no idea.

I’m leaving it at this: at least I ran today and regardless of the amount I’m still happy that I got out there and did a different route.  I do want to run more than 3 miles at a time so I need to map out different routes in my area.

I still have to do the Jillian Michael’s 30 Day Shred later tonight.  It was an awesome workout last night, so I can’t wait!!